The Grossest Infestation Ever

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I am so sorry it has been so long. Clearly we are slackers and felt like we had nothing important / interesting to say for… months. Also. Lazy.

Wedding was fun, summer is here. You know, the usual.  Here’s Katie and me at my wedding.

05-02 Lauren & George -309

But here’s really what we need to discuss: infestations. Not the cute kind, like koalas. My office has been dealing with a roach problem. It makes me feel itchy and paranoid ALL the time!

How-to-Get-Rid-of-Cockroach-Infestations

Do you work in a barn, you ask? NO! I work in a posh, converted warehouse. A.K.A. – no insulation, but vaulted ceilings and hipster / whiskey / organic vegan area….

Now, roaches are much larger in person than you think. And slow. But no matter how slow, you start running like a motha when one scuttles toward you.

My office manager thought, ok, we’ll do a thorough cleaning. That should do it. FALSE. They get into everything and come out of everywhere. Roach traps? Yup, that caught a few (**vomit). Apparently they can burrow into soil, so all of our office plants had to go (I miss the greenhouse / fresh air effect!).

Now, when I come in in the morning, my first question is, have there been any roach sightings? I check my traps. Not a “fresh” way to start the day.

So, much like any office building, they keep the AC at subzero. You know, so you come to work in the sweltering heat, sweat your butt off, walk into the building, and immediately catch a cold from the air difference and sniffle all day, huddled in your desk chair, lamenting your lack of layers. I keep a zip up fleece over my chair at work. For just such instances. Smart, right? Except now, when I put it on, I think, I wonder if any roaches are hiding in there…. So then I play the game, “How cold is it?” and “Should I risk putting my arm in the sleeve, only to feel the scratchy scuttling?”

THE HORROR.

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