No one has ever accused me of being graceful. I am awkward. If there ‘s a way to fall, spill, or break something – I’m your girl.

This speaks the truth of my life – “15 Reasons You’re Not A Disney Princess

Exhibits A-Z

my “waterproof/smudgeproof” makeup smudges like it’s no one’s business


Morning hair? Rats nest

You know that “sexy, flawless, didn’t even try” look? Nope. Me neither. It’s called sweatpants and coffee stains.

When I do bother to brush my hair, blow it dry, and TRY to wear it down for more than… 20 minutes, I immediately feel like I am in a sauna, I sweat from everywhere, my hair frizzes, and ponytail girl returns

That polite, interested face we all fake billions of times during the week? I have a hard time not giving you a WTF smirk. You can read my facial emotions like a book. I was throwing shade before that was a thing. Unintentionally.


Most clothing on me is either SUPER TIGHT or might as well be a moo moo



Katie: Well, I, too, suffer from severe awkwardness. For instance, today I was walking down the aisle in my second home – Safeway – and I had boots on. I felt so super sassy. Until my boots realized their grip,was non existent and I almost slipped and fell. Casual awk. Good thing there were people in the aisle with me! I almost pulled some random dude down. Sweet. Pretty sure people don’t confuse the words “effortless” or “sexy” with “Katie”. I stumble while standing still. It is an art.

Lauren and I laugh all day about our awkwardness. Frankly, she is the awk yin to my awk yang. She may have a face that is an open book but my mouth is what usually displays my ability to turn any situation into a weird one. I often speak off the cuff, don’t think before I speak, and don’t even realize I’m speaking aloud. I am glad that the husband and Lauren love me for it. As I get older, I’m actually ok with it and also appreciate that it gets weird sometimes. (All the time.)

Lauren…one word: PRODUCT


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