I am shy. I know what you’re thinking – I call BS! But no, I am. Maybe not on paper, or in one-on-ones, but in larger groups, I prefer to be invisible.
I don’t know exactly when that happened, but some time in high school or college, I stopped raising my hand or volunteering my thoughts in large group settings. If I was called on, I would blush and turn bright red as I answered. In meetings, I may have opinions, I may have insight, but it is hard for me to jump in.
In all of my career annual reviews, I have been told that I am smart and capable and they wished I contributed more in groups, the way I do in one-on-one conversations.
The idea makes me sweat and blush and feel super awkward and want to hide in my cubicle. I know I know, the only why to get better at something is to force yourself to try. “Fake it ’til you make it,” as my stepfather would say (over and over).
But no joke…. I am awkward.
I think this is apparently in how long it takes me to let loose and become deeper friends with new people. Just ask Katie. It takes me a long time to let someone in. But once they’re there, they’re in for a treat!