De plane! De plane!


Hey there! I’ve been a little MIA for a few days because I had a wee bit of traveling to do and also, I’ve been struck down with the sickness.

Guess what guys? I LOVE TO FLY. If I were a superhero and had a super power, it would totally be flying. Any animal – Yup. A bird. I’d be so good at flying. Also, less angry because I would not have to deal with Maryland drivers. A gal can dream, right?

Over the past few years I have take at least two trips a year that involved flying. Husband does not like the flying. I am not sure what his issue is. Whenever I take long flights (six hours or more), he always shakes his head and asks me what in the world I will do during that time. Um. HELLO!!?? This totally falls under the category of “me time.” “Me time” also includes waiting in the long lines at the grocery store, pharmacy line, getting my hair done, circling the lot at any parking lot looking for a spot or any time I am alone. I know some people get pissed when they have to wait but after being married, having a kid, working, and doing all the other grown up things that I don’t always feel like doing, I’m not by myself very much any more. The good old days of curling up in bed alone and taking an awesome nap? Still happens on occasion but it is never alone. For a few years there, I can’t even remember a time when I was alone in our house. Just this morning, husband and I were laughing while discussing the last time we even went to the bathroom alone. So, to answer husband’s question of what the hell will I do during a flight? NOTHING. NOTHING. NOTHING. I don’t have to talk to anyone. I don’t have to cook for anyone. I don’t have to clean. I don’t have to think. I don’t have to do ONE. SINGLE. THING. And it is awesome. I charge up the good ol’ Kindle, the iPod and I’m ready to go.

Please tell me if you can think of one thing more awesome in this world than sitting inside a tube at 10,000 feet and hurtling towards the clouds and fifty gagillion miles an hour. You can’t. I always sit over the wing (so I can check to make sure there isn’t anyone on it…jk) so I can see that as well as the ground. Usually take off is my favorite part of the ride, and in my head, I am usually fist pumping and wanting to high 5 everyone around me. I also contemplate asking the person next to me if they want to hold hands. I wouldn’t put it past me one day to finally ask in the hopes that it wouldn’t be too creepy. I mean, I know it is creepy but just to share the freaking awesomeness of speeding down the runway! KREFKSdjf;lkajf;lkdsjglkshkjfdshgs;lkfd I also really find it funny when the plane taxis around on the runway like it is an enormous car.

I rue the days that those assholes ruined flying for everyone on so many levels. I’m cool taking my shoes off and whatever, but I miss the days of seeing the cockpit and the pilots and hate the repeated warnings about standing in lines waiting for the bathroom. You shouldn’t have to be scared to do this or suspicious about everyone else on the plane. Ugh. Dicks.

Anyhoo. Last week I took a brief trip and had the most wonderful of flights. The people were cool. I met a nice guy who travels a lot and flies small planes around the country for investors and such. Seemed like it would be interesting. The planes weren’t crowded and I didn’t have to share a seat with anyone. It was great. And, I read. And I sat. And I thought. And, well, I didn’t have to do anything but cheer on how fast we were going and feel how every once in a while it is so great to have someone else take over for a minute.

That was my view from last week. I looked out the window and was like “Oh hey there, other plane!”

The next time you are on a plane, seriously, settle down. They are awesome. They take you to fun places, to see people you love, or to better weather!! Stop getting so jittery. Hold hands with your neighbors ( I swear I won’t make it weird). High 5 the guy across the aisle. Sit back. Stop thinking about work, bills, weather, or anything. Read a damn book. Look at all the weird stuff in the Sky Mall. You know you want the backyard yeti. Look out the window and look at where we live. It’s pretty freaking awesome.


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